The Bridge to Salemithia

It has been called the “bridge to nowhere” by local Salem residents, but make no mistake that distinction won’t last much longer.  Local real estate developer, FantaMagic Properties, has purchased the land on Minto Brown Island and plans were recently approved by the city.

“We are really excited to see what happens with the development,” said Mayor Anna Peterson.  “I’ve always felt that Turner outclassed Salem with Enchanted Forest.  Now, we can really stand out and compete against Turner.  It’s a dream come true.”

Developer FantaMagic is well known for creating unique developments and Salem is truly fortunate that they chose our mid-sized city for their latest project.  Complete with homes on the river, a natural forest, lakes and ponds, this development is sure to be something truly special.

I was invited to tour this new development, Salemithia, and you guessed it…listings are exclusive through Tomson Burnham.  What can I say?  We rock.    I was duly impressed with the unique, twisting design for the bridge and asked about the inspiration for the design.

“Let’s face it. Portland has straight bridges and we don’t want to be like Portland.  They’re weird, “said the developer. “My curly cue design keeps Salemites in an endless adventure as they cross the river.  Plus it gives the trolls more time to grab your leg.  Let’s face it, this gen Y group?  Slackers.  All of ‘em.  So the inspiration?  Just making it easier to feed the trolls.”

After engaging in Dances with Trolls across the bridge, Salem residents are greeted by the sweet warm smell of Dioxins.  “Nothing screams new development, like a little chemical contamination,” said real estate broker Melina Tomson.  “This is a one of a kind opportunity for planned community living here in Salem.  We have some incredible options for home plans.  I expect that the Gingerbread plan will be really popular, but we all have the Red Riding Hood, The Repunzel, and the H&G plan.  I expect the H&G will be popular with gourmet cooks. It has a killer oven. ”

The Bridge to Salemithia plans are below.


View April Fools Map in a larger map

 
If you want more information on this new and amazing development, contact Melina Tomson. I’ll even buy you some peanut brittle. ;-D

Leave a Reply